Journey's End
by Shonetta
Summary: Follows on from Endgame with a J/C twist.


**Star Trek Voyager characters are the property of Paramount Pictures**

**Journey's End **

"She's adorable," Kathryn said, gazing happily at newly born Miral Paris. "Definitely her mother's daughter."

"I hope so," B'Elanna teased, "otherwise I'm decompiling the Doctor."

Kathryn laughed softly. "And what perfect timing. I bet no one bet their replicator rations on this eventuality."

Tom, who was proudly standing beside his wife's biobed, spoke now. "Actually, Ron Parker did."

Kathryn looked up at him. "Really? He guessed B'Elanna would give birth in a Borg transwarp aperture?"

"Not exactly," Tom smiled. "But he joked that our baby would be born just as we reached Earth and for a laugh made his bet accordingly."

"Well," Kathryn replied. "I bet he's really laughing now."

The Doctor, who was clearing up close by, interjected. "Hardly, Captain. Now that we're home, what will he need with a prize of replicator rations?"

Before Kathryn could answer, Chakotay's voice sounded over the comm. "Chakotay to Janeway. There's an incoming transmission from Admiral Josephine Marthon. She wishes to discuss descent and disembarkment procedures with you."

Kathryn responded. "Put the transmission through to astrometrics and tell her I'll be with her shortly."

"Understood. Chakotay out."

"How long exactly until we disembark?" B'Elanna asked.

"I'm not sure," Kathryn replied. "Our return is classified at the moment. It's going to be big news so Starfleet Command want time to inform our families and prepare a welcome. We'll keep circling until we get the go ahead."

"I guess we'll be celebrities," Tom said.

"At least for a while," Kathryn answered. "But you know the old saying, today's newspad is tomorrow's recycled boots." She then smiled warmly at the happy couple before leaving. "Congratulations again."

* * *

When Kathryn arrived on the bridge over an hour later, she found the place almost deserted.

"Where is everyone?" she asked, walking over to Harry's station.

"Celebrating already," he smiled. "Except Tuvok. He's making a security check."

Kathryn looked over to the helm. Instead of seeing Chakotay, as she expected, she saw Lieutenant Paul Rivers.

"Where's Chakotay?"

"I don't know. He left and put Lieutenant Rivers in charge."

"I see. How long ago was this?"

"About half and hour ago, maybe longer. I've kind of lost track."

"I need to speak to him about our arrival. Did he say how long he'd be gone?"

"No. I got the impression a while."

Kathryn stepped away from Harry's station and hit her commbadge. "Janeway to Chakotay."

Only silence answered.

Kathryn tried again. "Janeway to Chakotay..."

Again there was no reply.

"Computer," Kathryn said, "locate Commander Chakotay."

In seconds, the computer replied. "Unable to locate Commander Chakotay."

Harry spoke. "There was a lot of damage to the ship as we traveled through the aperture. Scanners aren't functioning properly. Almost a quarter of our crew can't be located."

"Then I'll just have to look for him on foot," Kathryn said. "I'll try his quarters, then the Mess Hall. If you see him, tell him I'm looking for him."

"Yes, Ma'am," Harry replied.

Just as Kathryn was about to leave the bridge, Tuvok came in.

"Captain, I've been looking for you."

"Well," Kathryn smiled. "Here I am."

"I'm afraid I have disturbing news."

"Nothing can spoil my mood today, Tuvok," she teased. "Not even one of Seven's tantrums."

"This tantrum might," Tuvok answered matter-of-factly. "Seven has left Voyager and I believe Commander Chakotay has gone with her."

Kathryn flinched. "What do you mean has left Voyager? How?"

"About an hour ago I detected what I believed to be an unauthorized shuttle launch. With so many of the ships systems compromised I could not be sure, so I have spent the past hour investigating. There is indeed a shuttle missing from the shuttle-bay and the only crew members I have been unable to locate on foot are Seven of Nine and Commander Chakotay."

"Seven going, I can half believe," Kathryn replied. "She's always had anxities about returning to Earth. But Chakotay? He'd never do something like this."

"He has left Voyager before."

"In very different circumstances. He'd never run out on the other Maquis."

"Ensign Barton saw them both heading towards the shuttle-bay just over an hour ago. He never saw them leave."

"I can't believe it," Kathryn said. "If Seven's gone, she's gone alone."

"The Commander and Seven of Nine have formed an emotional attachment," Tuvok continued. "Given their relationship, Chakotay's Maquis past, and Seven's emotional challenges, they may well have decided to leave Voyager prematurely for the Commander's homeworld. As Trebus is no longer part of the Federation, Federation law no longer applies there. Chakotay will be immune from criminal prosecution, and Seven of Nine will not have to endure public celebrity."

Harry looked at Tuvok as though he had gone mad. "You're not seriously saying Chakotay is involved with Seven, are you? He's always been..." he was going to say 'in love with the Captain' but stopped himself just in time. "There's no way they've ran off together. I'd find it easier to believe she's abducted him!"

"That is another possibility," Tuvok replied calmly. "Humanoids with emotional instability are prone to obsessive behavior. Seven may well have forced the Commander to accompany her."

"Right now," Kathryn said, "all we know for sure is that there has been an unauthorised shuttle launch and Seven of Nine is in the frame. Given her personal history, I can accept that possibility. But I will not accept that Chakotay is involved. I know him better than I know myself and know he would never abandon the Maquis." She turned to Harry. "Harry, scan surrounding space for a shuttle."

Harry did as he was told.

"The shuttle is cloaked," Tuvok informed her, "and the warp trail masked. I spent no less that fifteen minutes trying to find it."

Harry looked up from his console. "Nothing, Captain."

"We must inform Starfleet Command," Tuvok said.

"Not yet," Kathryn replied. "We'll keep looking for the shuttle. If we can't find it in ten minutes, then we'll tell them."

With that, she left Harry's console and made her way over to her chair. Just as she sat down, Ayala came in and addressed her.

"Captain."

Kathryn turned to him. "What is it, Lieutenant?"

"Commander Chakotay is missing. We can't find him anywhere."

Kathryn got to her feet and shot her eyes at Tuvok. "Don't say you told me so, Tuvok, I'm still not accepting it." She turned back to Ayala. "Keep looking. He may be trapped somewhere. Several sections of the ship have collapsed."

Ayala gave an obedient nod. "Yes, Captain."

When he left, Kathryn wandered back to Tuvok's station. "If, and I'm only saying if, Chakotay is with Seven, then it's because she's forced him to go with her. Maybe she needed his expertise so threatened him with either our or his safety."

"That is a possibility," Tuvok concurred, "but Seven of Nine is more than capable of leaving Voyager without assistance."

"It's the only possibility I'm accepting," Kathryn said. She turned to Harry. "Any sign of the shuttle?"

"None," he answered. "And I've tried everything I can think of to find it."

"So have I," Tuvok stated.

"Then looks like I'll have to inform Starfleet Command," Kathryn said sadly. "I just hope with their advanced technology they'll be able to find them."

* * *

"This is most unfortunate," Admiral Paris said when Kathryn told him about Seven and Chakotay's disappearance. "There are still those in Starfleet Command, and elsewhere, who feel the Maquis should be punished for their criminal activities. We've persuaded our colleagues that due to their loyal service on Voyager, and the current political climate, exoneration is for the best, but if Chakotay has tried to evade responsibility for his past by escaping, it could open a can of worms. I must warn you that there are those who feel you made the wrong decision in making him your First Officer and this will only harden their opposition to you. Some say you were clearly a Maquis Sympathizer and should never have been sent to capture him in the first place." He paused. "All I can suggest is that if we find Chakotay and Seven, we don't make their attempted escape public. It would not be in ours, yours or their interest to do so. The less controversy Voyager's return causes, the better for everyone."

"Agreed," Kathryn said. "Only a handful of senior officers know of Seven's escape. With discretion on your part, we may be able to get them back without the rest of the crew having to know they were ever gone. But I must again emphasize that this is totally out of character for Chakotay. If he is with her, and we don't know for sure that he is, he must be there against his will. He would never abandon the Maquis."

"I take your word for it," Admiral Paris said. "And we'll do our best to find them. Stand by."

* * *

Sipping a cup of coffee to calm her inner turmoil, Kathryn stood at a window in her ready room and gazed out at Federation stars. She had pinched herself so many times over the past few hours to make sure she wasn't dreaming that her arm was covered in bruises. For so many years she had longed to get her crew home, but this...time-travel, her other-self, the Borg, Chakotay and Seven...none of this was anything like she had ever imagined. Neither would any of it be what she would have chosen. After so many years of struggling to play by the rules, it felt like a betrayal of everything she had ever stood for to get home by a "quick fix". But then, perhaps none of this was real. Perhaps it was all just a dream or part of an alternate reality that she would one day remember nothing about. Could Chakotay really be in love with Seven? There was no reason why he couldn't love her, no reason why he shouldn't, but it seemed so unlikely. He had never given any indication of having romantic feelings for her, but her older-self had said he loved her and implied it was with her he was going to spend his future. Even though she knew she had no right, especially after all that had happened between them, the thought of Chakotay and Seven together hurt her heart.

Suddenly, Tuvok's voice spoke. "Incoming transmission, Admiral Paris."

Kathryn turned away from the window and made her way over to her desk. "Acknowledged. Put him through."

In seconds, Admiral Paris's face appeared on her monitor.

"Any news?" Kathryn asked anxiously.

"Yes," her old mentor replied. "Seven of Nine is in custody. Commander Chakotay was not aboard her vessel."

Relief consumed Kathryn. She knew he would never run out on his crew. "I'm glad to hear it."

"The only Chakotay we found on the shuttle was a hologram."

Kathryn swallowed. "A hologram?"

"Projected by the same mobile emitor your EMH uses. It was inside him...took our team a while to deactivate him."

Kathryn desperately tried to absorb this. "But that makes no sense. Why would Seven run away with a hologram of Chakotay?"

"I think you'd better ask her that. We're going to transport her back to your ship."

"Understood," Kathryn said. "Thank you for your assistance and discretion."

"You're welcome." He then smiled warmly. "It really is so good to see you again."

Kathryn smiled in return. "You too, Sir."

The connection then terminated and the screen went blank.

* * *

When Seven finally materialized in transporter room one, Kathryn didn't know whether to hug her or scream at her. In the end she did neither. However angry she was, she had to try and remember how frightening all this was to Seven. Apart from the Borg, Voyager was all she had ever known. On this ship she had found a place to belong, had found a home, a family. Now her world was shattered.

"Welcome back," Kathryn said, firmly but not unkindly.

Seven was agitated, visibly distressed. "I do not want to be here," she said. "Let me go."

Kathryn closed the gap between them and put her hand on the ex-drone's shoulder. "Everything's going to be ok, Seven. I know you're frightened at the thought of getting to Earth, but there's no need to be. Getting home isn't going to change what we've all become to each other. You'll be surrounded by friends and family on Earth and will have more opportunities in life than you've ever imagined."

"I'm not frightened," Seven protested. "I just do not want to return to Earth. I want to go to Trebus with Chakotay. I want to be with him."

"The Chakotay on your ship was a hologram," Kathryn said. "What can you tell me about that?"

"He isn't a hologram," Seven answered, putting her hand to her head as though she was in pain, "he's real."

"That's not what Admiral Paris tells me. He says the only Chakotay on board with you was a hologram projected from the Doctor's holo-emitor." She held up the holo-emitor. "Here it is. He transported it back to me."

"He's lying," Seven cried. "Chakotay is real. He's real!" In distress, the former Borg turned away from Kathryn and leant against a wall, clearly in great pain. "He's real and he loves me. He does. He loves me!"

In concern, Kathryn hit her commbadge. "Janeway to transporter room one, transport me and Seven to sickbay."

Seconds later, the transporter beam engulfed them. When they rematerialized, they were in sickbay. B'Elanna and Tom had recently left with Miral and the Doctor was alone. Seven, however, seemed oblivious to her new surroundings.

"He does love me," she cried. "He does! And he's real. We're going to Trebus. You can't stop us!"

The Doctor made his way over to them. "What's going on?"

Kathryn turned to him. "Something's wrong with Seven. It's as though she's having some kind of breakdown."

"There's nothing wrong with me," Seven cried. "I just don't want to be here. I want to be with Chakotay."

The Doctor began to examine the former drone.

"You're right, Captain," he said in concern. "Several of her implants are malfunctioning causing physical and mental impairment."

"There's nothing wrong with me," Seven continued to protest. "I just don't want to be here. Why won't any of you listen? Why? Why? Why?"

Kathryn took Seven by the arms. "We are listening, Seven. But you're not well. We're going to help you."

"I don't need help! I just need to be out of here. I just need Chakotay!"

Moving quickly, the Doctor put a hypospray to Seven's neck and in seconds she became drowsy. With Kathryn's help, he got Seven on to the bed and as soon as she was horizontal, gave her another hyposhot.

Kathryn watched in concern. "Why are her implants failing, Doctor?"

"I don't know," he replied. It was possible she was experiencing complications after her surgical procedure, but her current condition seemed totally unrelated. "I'm going to have to do some tests..."

He fiddled with some equipment and then began to scan her.

"I don't believe it," he said.

Kathryn looked up at him. "What?"

"Her implants have stabilized...it's like they were never failing." He moved to the other side of the bed. "Her body is recovering..."

Kathryn questioned. "What does that mean?"

"I'm not sure," the Doctor answered. "Maybe I've been..."

"What?"

He was going to say 'treating the wrong problem' but instead phrased things more vaguely, "missing something. The interaction between Seven's Borg implants and human physiology is extremely complicated. There's never been a precedent to treating her. I've had to learn on the job. There may be a vital component in her brain I'm overlooking...something that's failing then re-powering. It would explain a lot of things."

"Anything I can do?"

"No," the Doctor replied. "There's nothing that can be done except intensive scans. I could wake her up, but the problem is likely to recur. It's best that I work on finding the problem."

"Agreed. Inform me when..." her voice trailed when she saw that the Doctor was wearing his holo-emitor. "Your emitor!" she exclaimed.

The Doctor glanced at it. "What about it?"

Kathryn reached into a pocket of her pants and pulled out an identical emitor. "I was going to return this to you. It was found with Seven on her shuttle, running a hologram of Chakotay."

"It's not mine," the Doctor said. "Mine's been with me the whole time. Where could she have got it from?"

"I don't know," Kathryn replied. "She must have replicated it somehow."

"And what's all this about her being on a shuttle?"

"Nevermind for the moment," Kathryn answered. "Just concentrate on treating her. I'm going to find Chakotay." She slipped the emitor back into her pocket. "Inform me as soon as you have news."

With that, she left.

* * *

Chakotay's quarters were empty when Kathryn arrived there. He had been missing now for over two hours and with every minute that passed, her concern for his safety was growing. Could he be lying under a heap of rubble somewhere, unconscious and close to death? No, she would not think it. If he was trapped somewhere, he was alive, unhurt, just unable to get out or communicate. With a team looking for him in all the damaged sectors of the ship, it wouldn't be long before they found him.

Wanting to make sure Chakotay wasn't in his quarters, Kathryn made her way to his bathroom. A quick glance around told her the room was vacant and she returned to his bedroom. Just as she was about to leave the room, a framed photo beside his bed caught her attention. It was a picture of him and Seven. Slowly, Kathryn made her way over to the picture and picked it up. Seven was standing next to Chakotay in a sexy blue dress and her implants were gone. Kathryn frowned. The picture was strange. Not only could she never remember seeing Seven in that dress, but it was impossible for Seven to have been without her facial implants. The picture could have been taken on the holodeck, but if it was, and this was really Chakotay in the picture, he would never have made Seven feel ashamed about her implants. He would certainly not have chosen to put this picture on display. He would have put up one of her as she truly is.

But if Chakotay hadn't put this picture here, who had? His holographic counterpart? Seven? Kathryn's stomach began to churn with a terrible thought. Just how long had Seven's holographic Chakotay been running? Was it him who had been with her on the bridge as they returned to the Alpha Quadrant? Was it him who had turned down her invitation to dinner? And if it was him, where was Chakotay?

"Computer," she said, "when was Commander Chakotay last onboard?"

"System damage. Unable to answer."

"Damn it," Kathryn cried. In anxious frustration, she left the bedroom for the living room, all kinds of thoughts racing through her mind. "Janeway to Tuvok," she said, hitting her commbadge, "Find out when and where Chakotay's lifesign was last recorded."

"I have just done so," Tuvok replied. "His lifesign was last recorded in the shuttlebay with Seven of Nine's."

"But that's impossible," Kathryn answered. "He wasn't..." Then another terrible thought occurred to her. Quickly, she reached into the pocket of her pants and pulled out the emitor. "Nevermind, Tuvok," she said. "Janeway out."

With skillful fingers, Kathryn fiddled with the holo-emitor's settings, activating the Chakotay program but without display.

"Computer," she said. "Locate Commander Chakotay."

"Commander Chakotay is in his quarters."

Kathryn froze. She was right. Seven had programmed the ship's computer to recognize the holo-emitor as Chakotay's lifesign.

"Tuvok to Janeway. Commander Chakotay's lifesign has just appeared on sensors. He is at your location."

"I know," Kathryn said quietly. "But it isn't him. Keep looking..."

Tuvok's confusion was evident in his voice. "Captain?"

"Just do as I say!"

"Yes, Captain," Tuvok replied. "Tuvok out."

In the silence that followed, Kathryn stood frozen to the spot where she stood. If the computer had been programmed to recognize the holo-emitor as Chakotay's lifesign, how long had he been missing? Days, weeks, months? No, it couldn't be that long, it just couldn't be. It had to be days, even hours. There was no way a hologram could pass for Chakotay longer than that, even with a concealed holo-emitor. And maybe she was wrong. Maybe Chakotay was here...maybe repairs meant that his lifesign was now showing up on sensors...maybe it was just a coincidence of timing that she switched on the holo-emitor at the same time his lifesign appeared...maybe Seven had hidden him in here somewhere...

There was only one way of finding out.

Trembling slightly, Kathryn switched off the holo-emitor and addressed the computer.

"Computer, locate Commander Chakotay."

"Commander Chakotay cannot be found."

Her heart racing, Kathryn switched it on again.

"Computer, locate Commander Chakotay."

The computer gave the dreaded confirmation. "Commander Chakotay is in his quarters."

* * *

"Wake her up," Kathryn cried, walking over to where Seven lay in sickbay.

"Excuse me?" the Doctor asked, surprised at her tone and manner.

"I said wake her up! I need answers!"

"Even if I could wake her, I wouldn't. And I can't. She suffered another episode, worse this time, and has slipped into the equivalent of a coma. What's the emergency?"

"She's done something to Chakotay," Kathryn replied, concern for her First Officer outweighing her concern for Seven, "and I want to know what!"

The Doctor frowned. "I don't understand."

In frustration, Kathryn pulled out the holo-emitor from her pocket and placed it on the bio-bed. "She's replaced Chakotay with a hologram. I want to know what she's done with him."

"That's impossible," the Doctor said, picking up the holo-emitor. "How could she do that?"

"Just listen." She took the emitor from the Doctor, switched it to stand-by, and then addressed the computer. "Computer, locate Commander Chakotay."

"Commander Chakotay is in sick-bay."

Kathryn looked at the Doctor directly. "Do you see him?"

"But why would she do that?" the Doctor asked.

"Isn't it obvious? Because the real Chakotay wouldn't play her love-games. I want to know where he is and only she can tell me. If she's programmed the computer to recognize this emitor as him, then she may have made him invisible to our sensors. That means where ever she's put him, he won't be detected."

"I can't believe this," the Doctor said. "Seven has had problems over the past few months but nothing that would suggest behavior as deranged as this."

"Evidently you missed it," Kathryn replied. "And so did I. But what matters now is finding Chakotay."

The Doctor's face fell and he turned away.

Kathryn questioned. "What is it?"

"If Seven has been behaving so irrationally, there's no certainty that the Commander is still alive."

"I'm not accepting that," Kathryn answered. "And I know what you're going to say next, she might have dumped him somewhere in the Delta Quadrant. But I'm not accepting that either. Voyager is big enough to hide someone in, alive or otherwise. He's on board, I'm certain of it."

"Then you'll have to start looking for him," the Doctor said, "because unless I find a way of treating Seven, she won't be telling you anytime soon."

* * *

"There's no sign of him back here," Samantha Wildman said, searching the Cargo Bay with Kathryn. "I've checked everywhere, even the Jeffrey's tube."

"He's got to be here somewhere," Kathryn said, opening another container. "It's the most likely place she'd hide him. Hardly anyone ever comes down here."

Samantha approached her. "Maybe I should ask Naomi if she knows of any secret hiding places Seven might have shown her. They often play hide and seek with Icheb."

"Good idea," Kathryn said. "Get to it."

"Yes, Ma'am," Samantha replied.

As she left the Cargo Bay, Kathryn looked into the last container and felt both relief and frustration to find it empty.

"Damn it," she cried. "Where are you, Chakotay?"

Suddenly, something fell behind her, clanging and banging as it hit the floor. Kathryn turned around and saw that a plastic crate had fallen off a stack in the distance. Samantha must have disturbed the pile when she searched the area. Dismissing the incident, Kathryn turned back to her part of the Cargo Bay and began to scan a section of wall. As she did so, another crate fell behind her, clanging and banging. Kathryn turned around again, expecting the entire bundle to fall any moment, and sure enough they did. Kathryn was just about to return to her search when she noticed something strange on the wall where the crates should have been. It was something silver, something small, something flashing. Kathryn hurried over to it and scanned it with her tricorder, but to her surprise the tricorder only registered a blank wall. The device, whatever it was, was invisible to her tricorder. Next to the device was a small hole in the wall, barely bigger than a finger nail, but sharp and raw. Running in a vertical downwards direction was a fine line, only milimeters thick, and another ran across the wall in a horizontal direction. The wall had clearly been repaired at some point in an amateurish fashion. Her heart racing, Kathryn pulled out her phazer and quickly began to cut through the welded wall. Before she had finished cutting, the weak joint-line crumbled and a chunk of wall fell to the floor. Sweating, Kathryn pushed it aside, got on her knees, and looked into the huge gap in the wall. It took a moment for her eyes to adjust to the darkness, but then, only a few feet down the interwall, she saw Chakotay . He appeared to be lying on his side, his hands tied behind his back and his legs locked together with a rope. Without a thought for her own safety, Kathryn hurried into the hole and scrambled down the narrow passage.

"Chakotay," she cried. "Are you ok?"

There was no answer.

"Chakotay..."

But when she reached him she saw that he was unconscious. Quickly, desperately, she put her hand to his neck and searched for his pulse, hoping with every part of her being that he was still alive... He was, barely.

"Janeway to Tuvok," she said. "I've found Chakotay. Can you detect him at my location?" Chakotay still wasn't showing up on her tricorder, but the ship's sensors were much more powerful.

Tuvok made no reply.

"Janeway to Tuvok. Respond."

Nothing.

Then Kathryn remembered the device that had first drawn her attention to this area. It had to be some kind of invisibility shield generator. Perhaps Seven hadn't made Chakotay invisible to sensors, perhaps it was the device that was making him so...

Quickly, she scrambled out of the hole, grabbed the device, and tried to deactivate it. When she couldn't, there was only one option...destroy it. Carefully, she aimed her phaser at it and fired.

Seconds later, Tuvok's voice spoke over the comm.

"Tuvok to Janeway. Commander Chakotay has reappeared on sensors. He appears to be in an interwall at your location."

"I know," Kathryn said, wiping her brow. "Get us transported to sickbay."

"Right away, Captain," Tuvok replied. "Tuvok out."

When the connection terminated, Kathryn hit her commbadge. "Janeway to the Doctor. I've found Chakotay. He's alive, but unconscious. Stand by for transport."

Seconds later, she felt the familiar tingle of transportation.

* * *

"He'll live," the Doctor said after examining Chakotay. "Apart from severe dehydration and a broken ankle, he's ok. But it's a good thing you found him when you did. A few more hours and he'd be dead."

A cold shiver ran through Kathryn's body at those words.

"As soon as he's sufficiently hydrated," the Doctor continued, "he'll regain consciousness."

"How long do you think he was in there for?" Kathryn asked, watching as the Doctor treated him.

"About three days," he answered. "Perhaps four."

Kathryn reached out and tenderly brushed her fingers against Chakotay's cheek. "I can't believe I didn't notice he'd been replaced with a hologram."

"How could you know?" the Doctor asked. "Things have been quiet the passed few days, that is until your counterpart showed up. There's been no away missions, no mass transporting, no attacks, no contact with another species...nothing that would alert us to the situation. We would surely have found out eventually."

"By which time it could have been too late," Kathryn said. "I don't understand...why the Admiral didn't tell us."

"Maybe she didn't know," the Doctor surmised. "Maybe she never found out. As much as it might surprise you, Captain, not everything that happens on this ship reaches your ears. Medical matters are confidential. In the Admiral's timeline, none of this happened. In her timeline, maybe Seven recovered enough of her senses to free Chakotay and correct her mistake. I strongly suspect she has no memory of replacing him. And if she has no memory of doing so, then to her his hologram would be real. He was clearly programmed to behave exactly like the Commander, with the exception of personal romantic attractions." The Doctor suspected he was a slightly modified version of her holo-lover, but he would never betray Seven's confidence by saying so. "But if she recovered the memory of replacing him, temporarily or otherwise, then that would have been enough to save him. If she didn't want anyone to know about what she'd done, Chakotay may well have agreed to keep the incident to himself. I certainly would have as part of Doctor/Patient confidentiality."

"I suppose you're right," Kathryn said. "And maybe that's when their relationship changed. Maybe they got closer after it."

"Maybe," he agreed.

Kathryn looked away from Chakotay to the Doctor. "How is Seven?"

"Critical, but stable," he said sadly. "I was right. I was missing something. Her problem wasn't her Borg implants, not directly, but her human physiology. Several Borg implants contain fluidic and metallic materials that can, on bio-exposure, cause systematic toxicity in sensitive individuals, resulting in various degrees of neurological degeneration and mental instability. As Seven's remaining Borg implants require a healthy human nervous system to function, they started to malfunction due to degenerating neural pathways. It never occurred to me to test her for systematic toxicity as most humans would not experience problems at such low exposure."

Kathryn considered this a moment. "Can these problem materials be changed for more biocompatible ones?"

"Yes," the Doctor answered, "and I have replaced them, but until Seven wakes up, there is no way of knowing how successful the procedure has been. She may wake up as right as rain, but on the other hand she may wake up with severe physical and mental impairment."

"Let me know as soon as she regains consciousness," Kathryn replied. "Chakotay too. In the meantime, we'll hope for the best."

The Doctor looked at Seven sadly. "I can't help but feel that I've let her down. I should have tested for systematic toxicity a long time ago. If I'd found this problem earlier, I could not only have prevented her condition escalating but devised a less risky method of treatment."

Kathryn reached out and put her hand on his arm. "You have nothing to reproach yourself for, Doctor. You've always done your best for Seven. If it wasn't for your dedication, she wouldn't be the remarkable woman she has become."

"I think most of the credit goes to you," the Doctor said. "You've befriended her, mentored her, guided her, and have not only helped her reclaim her individuality, but given her pride in that individuality. She is what she is thanks to you. Thanks to me, she's lying here unconscious, everything she's ever achieved lying in a fragile balance."

"Don't be so hard on yourself," Kathryn answered. "I know how special Seven is to you. I know there is nothing you wouldn't do for her. Don't punish yourself for not detecting this problem earlier, just be glad you've found it now."

"I suppose you're right," the Doctor conceded.

"Of course I am," Kathryn teased. "I'm always right."

* * *

A ringing at the door disturbed Kathryn as she sat at her desk trying to write up the promised account of Voyager's homecoming. Almost everyone else onboard was in the Mess Hall celebrating their return, but Kathryn needed to keep busy. It had been a roller-coaster of a day, euphoric on the one hand, devastating on the other, and channeling her bewildered emotions into work was one way of coping with them.

"Come in," she cried.

The doors opened and Harry came in.

"Lieutenant Harper's taking over from me on the Bridge," he said. "Would you like to accompany me to the Mess Hall? I hear there's quite a party going on."

"That's kind of you, Harry," Kathryn replied, "but I must finish our homecoming report."

"I see," he said, a little disappointed. "What will you say? I mean, will you tell them about the Admiral? Because I've been talking to a lot of people and they all agree that if you want to keep this...in the family...they won't say anything. We can just say an alien species helped us. No one wants you to get into any trouble. We know you only went along with her plans for our sake."

For a moment Kathryn was tempted, but then reality bit. "That's very kind of you all," she replied, "but the truth would out in the end. It always does. And I couldn't ask you all to lie. It's better if we tell the truth from the start. Whatever happens then, at least we won't be haunted by a lie. Guilt is a taxing companion."

"What do you think Starfleet Command will say?"

"I don't know. I'm hoping not much. We did break the Temporal Prime Directive, but one could argue it was broken as soon as... my counterpart...showed up. As she is the one who traveled through time, forcing us into the situation, I'm hoping Starfleet Command will take the view that we merely took advantage of a presented circumstance to help ourselves and millions of others."

Harry was just about to speak when the Doctor's voice sounded over the comm. "Doctor to Captain Janeway. Commander Chakotay has regained consciousness."

At those words, Kathryn's eyes lit up. "I'll be right there, Doctor."

"Not here," he replied, "unless you want a wasted trip. I've sent him to his quarters. So long as he rests, there's no need for him to stay here."

"Then I'll see him there. Thank you, Doctor. Janeway out." As the connection terminated, she smiled at Harry. "Looks like my report will have to wait."

* * *

Chakotay had just finished replicating a pot of coffee when the door chime sounded. Picking up the pot and carrying it over to a small table, laden with two silver cups and two slices of creamy coffee cake, he called out.

"Come in!"

The doors opened and Kathryn came in.

"You're supposed to be resting, Mister," she said when she saw him busy at the table.

Chakotay looked up at her and smiled. "The replicator did all the hard work, believe me." He gestured to the table. "Help yourself to coffee and cake. I know champagne is in order, but there's plenty of time for that."

"Plenty," Kathryn smiled.

"I'm only sorry I missed the big adventure."

A sadness filled Kathryn's eyes. "So am I." She paused. "And I'm sorry. I'm sorry I didn't realize you'd been replaced by a hologram."

"I've always said I'm easily replaceable," he teased. Then he fell serious. "But from what the Doctor told me, which wasn't a lot, you're the one who found me."

"Yes," she replied, "but that doesn't excuse my not realizing. You must have been in there for days."

"Four, to be exact," he said, "at least if today is Tuesday."

"What happened?"

"On Friday night, while I was in my office catching up on some work, Seven called me to the Cargo Bay. She said there was some kind of problem with Icheb. When I got there, I found her alone. I asked about Icheb, but instead of giving me answers, she fired her phaser at me. The next thing I remember is waking up in a dark place, unable to move from being tied up, and in a lot of pain in my leg. I tried to shuffle, find my bearings, find a way to safety, but it was no use. I couldn't see anything and no matter how many times I called out, no one came." He paused. "I thought Seven had been taken over by an alien. It didn't occur to me that she was ill."

"Nor to me. Looking back, she has been behaving a bit oddly lately, but I didn't really give her behavior much thought." She paused. "Seems I haven't been paying enough attention to a lot of things."

"It wasn't your place to notice," Chakotay answered. "It was the Doctor's. Seven's always been unpredictable, changeable."

"Maybe," Kathryn replied. "But I didn't notice Tuvok has been having problems either. You, Tuvok, Seven...the three people I'm closest too on this ship, and I didn't realize any of you were not yourselves."

"How could you? I mean, what was so different about my hologram that you'd notice I'd been replaced right away? If he wasn't in your company much, how could you tell? And you obviously had a big distraction."

Kathryn had to smile at that. "Ginormous. In all my years at Starfleet, I've never experienced anything quite like Admiral Kathryn Janeway."

"I bet. I wish I'd met her."

"Well," Kathryn smiled, "maybe in thirty years time you will."

"I look forward to it."

Tears filled Kathryn's eyes. "I can't believe it, Chakotay. I can't believe we're home. I'm almost afraid of believing it incase I wake up to find this is all just a dream, or find it's an alien hallucination, or the time-police turn up and send us back to the Delta Quadrant."

"I doubt it. Unless they're involved in an event somehow, I don't think they intervene. If they did, they could wipe out their own existence. Everything that happened before they came into existence is a part of their history." He put a gentle hand on her shoulder. "We're home, Kathryn. You did it."

Kathryn put her hand over his. "We did it, Chakotay. I couldn't have got through the past seven years without you." And she didn't know how she was going to get through the rest of her life without him at her side, but that sentiment she kept to herself. "And I want you there, Chakotay. When I walk off this ship, I want you by my side."

Chakotay squeezed her shoulder. "I'll be there." He paused and a dullness filled his eyes, an ache, a longing. "And I'll always be there," he said quietly, "if you want me to be."

Kathryn understood his meaning and her heart both rejoiced and despaired in a single beat. After so many years, after all they had been through, she didn't know if he still cared for her the way he once had, but now that he was implying that he did, the joy was stifled by the painful knowledge that they could never be together.

Chakotay saw that pain in her eyes and misread it as familiar rejection. Slowly, sadly, he let go of her shoulder. "I'm sorry," he said. "I just thought...It doesn't matter what I thought. Forget I said anything." He gestured to the table. "Please...help yourself."

Slowly, he sat down, trying not to let his heartache show. For so long he had loved Kathryn, for so long he had hoped that when they got home things would be different, but now that they were only miles away from Earth, things were just the same. Kathryn would never be his and somehow, someway, he had to accept that.

Her own heart aching just as profoundly, Kathryn sat opposite him. For a moment she watched as he poured himself a cup of coffee, then she spoke, speaking words that took all her strength to say.

"There is someone, Chakotay. Someone who wants and needs you at her side."

Chakotay looked up at her with tired eyes. "What's that supposed to mean?" His voice was quiet, but pain gave his tone a sharp edge.

Kathryn was a moment in answering. "Seven."

Chakotay frowned. "Seven?"

"She's in love with you."

Chakotay flinched. "In love with me?"

Kathryn nodded. "Didn't the Doctor tell you? That's why she substituted you for your hologram."

"I see," he said, averting his eyes.

"She needs you, Chakotay. She needs the love of a good man."

Chakotay's eyes found hers again. "If you're saying what I think you are, then the answer is I can't. I can't love her. She's beautiful, intelligent, courageous, everything any man could want, but she's not..." his voice fell to a whisper "she's not you."

Kathryn lowered her eyes and fiddled with her fingers. "You loved her in the Admiral's future...you were married. That has to mean you can love her in this one too."

"Who knows what happened in that future," Chakotay argued. "Maybe it wasn't me she married, maybe it was my hologram."

Kathryn looked up at him incredulously. "No way. Getting away with the switch for a few days is one thing, but for years? We'd have found out."

"I'm not so sure, not if all our systems, including newly replicated tricorders, were programmed to recognize my hologram as me." He paused. "But the truth is we'll never know. What matters is now, the future that is to come. We can't sacrifice a life together because of an alternate future we know nothing about. I don't want to be with Seven. I want to be with you."

"But she wants to be with you, Chakotay," Kathryn replied. "And I can't be the one to destroy her hopes. I can't break her heart, shatter her dreams."

Chakotay was about to reply when Tuvok's voice sounded over the comm. "Tuvok to Captain Janeway. Please report to the bridge."

Kathryn hit her commbadge, both glad and sorry for the interruption. "On my way."

She then got to her feet. "Try, Chakotay. Try to love her."

With that, she turned around and left.

* * *

A beep interrupted the Doctor as he worked in his office, and at the sound of it, he picked up his medical tricorder and hurried over to where Seven lay. The sound was alerting him to Seven's regaining of consciousness and within minutes her eyes fluttered open.

"Welcome back," the Doctor smiled happily.

Seven looked around, tried to get her bearings. "I am in sickbay."

"That's right," the Doctor replied.

Seven tried to move but found that her left arm was immobile. "I am damaged," she stated.

The Doctor scanned her, but to his relief found her problem was most likely temporary.

Seven spoke again. "Why am I damaged?"

"You suffered some complications during a surgical procedure," the Doctor explained, "but I am optimistic you will make a full recovery."

Seven looked up at him. "Surgery? Why did I need surgery?"

"To replace certain components in several of your Borg implants."

"For what reason?"

"Because they were causing systematic toxicity. You will need to detoxify for a few weeks, aswell as undergo physio and neuro-regenerative therapy for your current motor-neuro problems, but now the troublesome materials have been replaced, you should experience none of the problems you have of late."

Seven frowned. "I do not recall experiencing any problems of late."

The Doctor put down his tricorder. "Your recent fail-safe problem for example."

Seven looked at him blankly. "Fail-safe problem? I do not recall such a problem."

"You don't?" the Doctor asked in concern. "What is the last thing you remember?"

"I'm not sure," she said, draining her memories for the last remaining. "Being in Engineering, I think...with Lieutenant Torres. She was not feeling well...I detected a lifesign inside her."

"That was months ago," the Doctor said, concern growing. "Do you remember anything after? Anything at all?"

"No," she said.

The Doctor scanned her again, but got no useful answers from his tricorder.

"You are evidently suffering from Amnesia," he said, "but I'm going to have to perform further tests. Only then can I determine the extent and nature of the problem."

* * *

An hour later, Seven was sitting up in bed eating a sandwich with her working hand when Kathryn came in.

"Good to have you back with us," Kathryn said, walking over to the former drone.

"Thank you," Seven replied, putting down her sandwich. "And I believe congratulations are in order."

"You believe right," Kathryn smiled. "Voyager is home."

"It must be very satisfying to accomplish your long-desired goal."

"Very satisfying," Kathryn replied. "But enough about Voyager, how are you?"

"Damaged," Seven answered, "but functional."

The Doctor, who was close by, spoke. "To be precise, Seven has some motor-neuron impairment in her left arm and amnesia."

Concerned filled Kathryn's eyes. "I'm sorry."

"Your pity is unnecessary," Seven replied. "Already I have regained some movement in my arm and the loss of a few months memories is insignificant."

Kathryn glanced at the Doctor. "Months of memories?"

"The last thing Seven remembers is discovering B'Elanna's pregnancy."

"I see," Kathryn said sadly. "Will these memories return?"

"From the tests I have just performed," the Doctor told her, "it is extremely unlikely."

Seven spoke now. "Our memories live in the Collective mind," she said. "When a drone suffers damage to data processing implants, memory is sacrificed to protect more vital functions. It is extremely efficient and logical."

"Maybe to the Borg," Kathryn replied, "but you're no longer Borg. I'm sorry you've lost your memories of the past few months. Every life event, every experience, good or bad, shapes who we are and educates us."

"The loss of what I cannot remember is no loss," Seven answered. "What concerns me is what happens now. When Voyager reaches Earth, what will become of me?"

The Doctor spoke before Kathryn had a chance too. "That is up to you, Seven. You can do anything you want."

"The Doctor's right," Kathryn said reassuringly. "There's a world of opportunity, and a family, waiting for you."

Seven considered this a moment. "Will my aunt be amongst all the relatives awaiting the crew?"

Kathryn smiled. "She sure will be."

"Then I won't be alone?"

The Doctor interjected. "Never, Seven. You'll never be alone. You'll always have me, and you'll always have the Captain."

For a moment, tears welled in Seven's eyes, then they were gone. "I'm sorry, Captain," she said. "I'm sorry if I've spoiled your homecoming. The Doctor says I injured Commander Chakotay while mentally impaired."

Kathryn put a gentle hand on Seven's shoulder. "You haven't ruined anything, Seven. I'm just glad you're still with us." She smiled warmly. "Besides, the real homecoming celebrations haven't started yet."

* * *

Music, laughter and chatter filled a great garden as the Voyager crew celebrated their return with family and friends. Beneath a dome of sparkling stars, a small band play and all around were lavishly decorated tables of food. Amidst the stars a full moon shone, and Kathryn was not alone in cherishing the sight of that pearly orb. Seven had managed to join the party for a little while, but then had left with her aunt for Sweden. Tuvok, never one for parties at the best of times, had also left for Vulcan, and several Vulcan voyagers had joined him. Tom and B'Elanna had also left early, partly because B'Elanna needed to rest, partly because they wanted to be with their new born daughter. Harry was in his element, however, especially as he'd been invited to join the band for a couple of songs, and the Doctor was having the time of his life. Although he had been advised to take it easy, Chakotay had joined in the celebrations, and seemed to be holding up well. Most of the other Maquis members of Voyager's crew had left. While they had all been exonerated during the elaborate welcoming home ceremony, their reception by Starfleet Command had been somewhat cool, and no Maquis member, not even Chakotay, was given an honorary promotion when they were ceremoniously bestowed. Promotion had been strictly reserved for Starfleet officers. Most of the choices Kathryn agreed with, but some surprised her and had to be politically motivated. Without a doubt Harry deserved his promotion to Lieutenant, but the merit of Tal Celes's elevation was debatable. Her own promotion to Admiral had also been a surprise, but not an unwelcome one. After seven years of trying to get home, the last thing she wanted was to jet back off into space.

"In all her splendor just for us."

The voice was Chakotay's and Kathryn turned away from the moon to look at her First Officer.

"At least I hope so," he teased. "I'd hate to be dreaming."

Kathryn had to smile as she remembered their encounter with the sleeping species. "I'll never take the moon for granted again," she said. "It may not be a magnificent nebula or a supernova, just an orbiting sun-reflecting rock, but to me it's the most precious celestial sight."

"I feel the same about Uranta," he said, "our moon on Trebus. Compared to all the wonders I've seen, she's just like a gray pebble on a beach of rainbow shells, but more precious nonetheless." He paused. "And talking of Trebus, I'm leaving tomorrow."

The words seized Kathryn's heart and gripped it painfully. "Tomorrow? You're leaving tomorrow?"

Chakotay nodded. "Now that our mission is complete, there's no reason for me to stay."

Slowly, painfully, Kathryn turned away from him and gazed at her rejoicing crew. "I knew you'd want to go," she said quietly, "but I didn't think you'd leave so soon." Over the past seven years they had seen each other almost every day. The thought of him not being around was terrible.

"I want to see my sister," he said. "We didn't exactly part on good terms and haven't really had the chance to make things up since." Voyager had got home before his turn to talk to family had arrived.

Kathryn made no reply, just gazed into the glass of champagne she was holding in her hands.

"I don't know when I'll be back," he said. "Perhaps not for a long time. Admiral Paris says I'm welcome to rejoin Starfleet officially, but I'm not ready for that. I need to be with my people. I need to absorb the wisdom of the ancients and find my path in life. My father was right. I'll never find my way if I have no one or nothing to guide me but myself. That's why I've been lost for so long."

At that, Kathryn turned back to him. "You haven't been lost, Chakotay. You've been right where you were supposed to be. As I said earlier, I couldn't have got through the passed seven years without you." Tears filled her eyes. "And I hope you won't be gone too long. I'll miss you."

Tears filled Chakotay's eyes too. "I really don't know how long," he said quietly. "All I know is that I can't do this. I can't be around you feeling the way I do. All these years you've haunted my thoughts and now...now it's time to let go."

A tear ran down Kathryn's cheek, the only outward sign of her inward heartache. She wanted to tell him that she loved him, wanted to throw her arms around him and show him just how much, but she couldn't. She couldn't heal her heart by breaking someone else's. Seven loved him and one day he would love her too. One day, Seven would be the most important person in his life. Hurting him now was necessary for his happiness later, but he probably thought Seven was just an excuse.

"I won't see you again before I leave," he went on. "The Doctor's insisting that I rest, so I'm calling it a night." He then looked deep into her eyes, pain mixed with love in his own. "Have a good life, Kathryn. No one deserves to be happy more than you."

Then, before Kathryn knew it, he was gone.

* * *

FIVE MONTHS LATER

Beneath a setting summer sun, Chakotay stopped chopping logs to wipe his sweating brow. He had forgotten what hard work it was preparing fire-logs for winter. On Trebus, scorching summer quickly became wild winter. Days would soon be short and nights would be long and cold. Just like his father had done when he was a boy, he was preparing early for the icy season.

As he rested a moment, he looked at a group of children playing in the distance. They were running around, laughing, catching each other, and their happy shouts warmed his heart. There was life on this land once more. The last time he had visited, all he had seen here was desolation. And with more and more of his scattered tribe returning every year, this place would continue to grow and thrive. In time, it would be like the Cardassians had never attacked. Already the wounds were beginning to heal. And such a perfect healing would be the greatest way to honor the lives of those who had died. The last thing they would want would be permanent scars.

Suddenly, footsteps sounded behind him and Chakotay turned around. His heart stopped when he saw Kathryn Janeway standing before him. Her hair was longer now, falling softly over her shoulders, and her face was slightly freckled.

"Hi," she said.

It was a moment before Chakotay could speak. "Hi," he replied.

"I hope I'm not intruding," Kathryn went on, visibly uncomfortable, "I just..." Tears filled her eyes. "I wanted to see you."

Chakotay' slowly closed the gap between them. "You're welcome here any time."

"I heard from B'Elanna," Kathryn continued, "that you're thinking of not coming back...to Earth that is. That you're thinking of staying here."

"That's right," Chakotay answered.

A tear ran down Kathryn's cheek. "I don't want you to."

Chakotay flinched at those words and his already taut body tensed further with pain.

"I know now that there's never going to be a you and Seven. She's dating someone else and..." her voice fell to a whisper. "I love you and I miss you so much."

Tears filled Chakotay's eyes. "I love you too, Kathryn, I've always loved you. And I miss you so much that I feel dead inside. But I'd rather be dead inside than have to die all over again. Letting you go it's been...it's been the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I can't go through it again."

Trembling, Kathryn reached for Chakotay's hands and squeezed them. "You won't have to. I want you in my life always. I need you always. I've been so wrong, Chakotay...about so many things. But I'm here now, telling you I have been, and that...and that I'm yours always if you want me."

Slowly, tentatively, Chakotay reached out and brushed his hand against her cheek.

"Do you really mean it, Kathryn? Because if you don't ..."

Kathryn silenced him with a finger to his lips. "I mean it," she said. "I want us to be together."

Chakotay put his hand over hers as a tear ran down his cheek. "Then I'm yours."

Kathryn smiled joyfully and then slowly, gently, raised her lips to his in a tender kiss. Chakotay kissed her in return and then they held each other tight beneath the setting sun.

THE END


End file.
